2014年6月27日

好EQ搞定怪咖3法則

http://www.cheers.com.tw/article/article.action?id=5058206&page=3

人的個性百百種,有人主觀性強、有人愛唱反調、愛抱怨…,當團隊中出現EQ比主管自己還低、還有「個性」的秀異份子,不斷挑戰主管的極限時,「硬碰硬」只會造成衝突白熱化。這時你更需要好EQ做為基礎,因勢利導找出最好的方法。
畢竟,開除他看似最容易,卻顯示身為主管的自己沒有解決之道。「我把這看為磨練自己的機會,」台新國際商業銀行通路營運事業處業務管理部副總經理吳良民認為,帶人的能力,就是透過這一點一滴磨練,才能建立起來。
若你的部屬比你更無法控制情緒,《搞定怪咖員工創意法則》一書中,有3個原則可供參考。
與其痛罵,不如給予指導
作者羅倫斯.米勒(Laurence Miller)表示,主管的目標是矯正有問題的行為,而不是給員工痛擊,所以態度一定要保持堅定與客氣。指導可分6步驟:
1.清楚定義問題
最好以數字說明過去發生的問題。
2.定義問題影響範圍
提供並解釋適用於每個人的行為通則,他才不會認為只是針對他。
3.描述如何改善
明確表達你的期望,確定他了解你的意思。
4.進行示範或角色扮演
必要時示範給他看,讓他知道標準合理做法。
5.鼓勵對方改變
讓自己的指導看起來像是給對方機會,而不是「懲罰」。
6.記錄與摘要
把兩人討論且達成共識的內容記錄下來。
「EQ不好的員工,反面來看其實直率、熱情、有溫度,」遠東國際商業銀行協理蔡玉如對此則有與眾不同的解讀,「當他情緒過熱時,身為主管,就是要扮演『冷靜』的角色,不隨之起舞。」
蔡玉如提到,有一次她宣布一項新規定,導致一位業務同仁不開心,大呼小叫的說要轉調分行,還開始清理自己的座位,把不要的東西一股腦兒的丟在地上。
蔡玉如知道後,先請人幫他把地上的東西清走,等他情緒回復,再幫他分析剛才行為的效應。蔡玉如指出,這類員工並非不會自省,只是拉不下臉道歉,主管先展現包容力,他們事後反而會更努力。「所以,當下我又何必要發怒?」她笑著說。
與其命令,不如提供諮詢
諮詢則適用於「不是非常明顯的問題或違規行為,以及造成特定問題行為的態度或行事風格。」米勒提到,主管需要了解員工行為背後的主要原因,並採取支持、同理心的態度,引導員工提出建設性的解決方法。
曾經有業務員績效不佳,又看不出拜訪客戶的成效,所以吳良民接到主管指示,需要對方提出跑客戶時的細節。
如果直接這樣做,吳良民評估,對方一定會反彈。於是,他用了故事來比喻,詢問他如果自己的孩子老說要去圖書館,卻總是考試考不好,他會怎麼做?當對方提出可以從旁檢核的建議後,吳良民才順勢轉回正題,果然順利讓對方接受。
W Hotel餐飲部總監林芸慧帶領個性部屬的方法,也有異曲同工之處。她通常不以「命令」方式要對方調整態度,而是從「為什麼」要如此做,以及分享自己過去的經驗,來提醒對方,「要讓對方知道你是站在他的立場幫他想。」
與其容忍,不如懲戒
沒有人想下最後通牒,但如果部屬一直不願改變,對其他遵守組織文化與制度的員工其實並不公平,米勒也指出,這時就該採取懲戒或解雇的行動。
《創業家》雜誌(Entrepreneur)指出,在執行懲戒或解雇前,主管需要廣泛蒐集資訊,也要讓對方有說明或最後改正的機會,如果情況仍然沒有改善,就得堅定立場請他離開,否則可能對組織帶來更大的副作用。

2014年2月2日

Let It Go!





The snow glows white on the mountain tonight
Not a footprint to be seen
A kingdom of isolation, and it looks like I'm the Queen
The wind is howling like this swirling storm inside
Couldn't keep it in; Heaven knows I've tried
Don't let them in, don't let them see
Be the good girl you always have to be
Conceal, don't feel, don't let them know
Well now they know
Let it go, let it go
Can't hold it back any more
Let it go, let it go
Turn away and slam the door
I don't care what they're going to say
Let the storm rage on
The cold never bothered me anyway
It's funny how some distance
Makes everything seem small
And the fears that once controlled me
Can't get to me at all
It's time to see what I can do
To test the limits and break through
No right, no wrong, no rules for me,
I'm free!
Let it go, let it go
I am one with the wind and sky
Let it go, let it go
You'll never see me cry
Here I stand
And here I'll stay
Let the storm rage on
My power flurries through the air into the ground
My soul is spiraling in frozen fractals all around
And one thought crystallizes like an icy blast
I'm never going back, the past is in the past
Let it go, let it go
And I'll rise like the break of dawn
Let it go, let it go
That perfect girl is gone
Here I stand
In the light of day
Let the storm rage on
The cold never bothered me anyway!

2014年1月28日

19 Hard Things You Need To Do To Be Successful

http://www.businessinsider.com/hard-things-you-need-to-do-to-be-successful-2014-1


You have to do the hard things.

  • You have to make the call you’re afraid to make.
  • You have to get up earlier than you want to get up.
  • You have to give more than you get in return right away.
  • You have to care more about others than they care about you.
  • You have to fight when you are already injured, bloody, and sore.
  • You have to feel unsure and insecure when playing it safe seems smarter.
  • You have to lead when no one else is following you yet.
  • You have to invest in yourself even though no one else is.
  • You have to look like a fool while you’re looking for answers you don’t have.
  • You have to grind out the details when it’s easier to shrug them off.
  • You have to deliver results when making excuses is an option.
  • You have to search for your own explanations even when you’re told to accept the “facts.”
  • You have to make mistakes and look like an idiot.
  • You have to try and fail and try again.
  • You have to run faster even though you’re out of breath.
  • You have to be kind to people who have been cruel to you.
  • You have to meet deadlines that are unreasonable and deliver results that are unparalleled.
  • You have to be accountable for your actions even when things go wrong.
  • You have to keep moving towards where you want to be no matter what’s in front of you.
You have to do the hard things. The things that no one else is doing. The things that scare you. The things that make you wonder how much longer you can hold on.
Those are the things that define you. Those are the things that make the difference between living a life of mediocrity or outrageous success.
The hard things are the easiest things to avoid. To excuse away. To pretend like they don’t apply to you.
The simple truth about how ordinary people accomplish outrageous feats of success is that they do the hard things that smarter, wealthier, more qualified people don’t have the courage — or desperation — to do.
Do the hard things. You might be surprised at how amazing you really are.


Read more: http://danwaldschmidt.com/2014/01/attitude/hard-things#ixzz2rgcwKL9d


This post originally appeared at Edgy Conversations. Copyright 2014.

Read more: http://danwaldschmidt.com/2014/01/attitude/hard-things#ixzz2rgdRpW6m


2014年1月10日

Stanford research: The meaningful life is a road worth traveling

http://news.stanford.edu/news/2014/january/meaningful-happy-life-010114.html

A Stanford research project explored the key differences between lives of happiness and meaningfulness. While the two are similar, dramatic differences exist – and one should not underestimate the power of meaningfulness. "The quest for meaning is a key part of what makes us human," the researchers concluded.


While lives of meaningfulness and happiness overlap, they are distinctly different, according to Stanford research.
In a study published in the Journal of Positive Psychology, Jennifer Aaker of Stanford Graduate School of Business, along with colleagues, found answers about life in how people spend their time and what experiences they cultivate.
"Happiness was linked to being a taker rather than a giver, whereas meaningfulness went with being a giver rather than a taker," Aaker said.
The researchers surveyed 397 people over a month-long period, examining whether people thought their lives were meaningful or happy, as well as their choices, beliefs and values. They found five key differences between meaningfulness and happiness:
• Getting what you want and need: While satisfying desires was a reliable source of happiness, it had nothing to do with a sense of meaning. For example, healthy people are happier than sick people, but the lives of sick people do not lack meaning.
• Past, present and future: Happiness is about the present, and meaning is about linking the past, present and future. When people spend time thinking about the future or past, the more meaningful, and less happy, their lives become. On the other hand, if people think about the here and now, they are happier.
• Social life: Connections to other people are important both for meaning and happiness. But the nature of those relationships is how they differ. Deep relationships – such as family – increase meaning, while spending time with friends may increase happiness but had little effect on meaning. Time with loved ones involves hashing out problems or challenges, while time with friends may simply foster good feelings without much responsibility.
• Struggles and stresses: Highly meaningful lives encounter lots of negative events and issues, which can result in unhappiness. Raising children can be joyful but it is also connected to high stress – thus meaningfulness – and not always happiness. While the lack of stress may make one happier – like when people retire and no longer have the pressure of work demands – meaningfulness drops.
• Self and personal identity: If happiness is about getting what you want, then meaningfulness is about expressing and defining yourself. A life of meaning is more deeply tied to a valued sense of self and one's purpose in the larger context of life and community.
One can find meaning in life and be unhappy at the same time.
Aaker points out that this type of life has received less attention in the media, which has recently focused on how to cultivate the happy life.  Examples of highly meaningful, but not necessarily happy, lives may include nursing, social work or even activism.
The unhappy but meaningful life involves difficult undertakings and can be characterized by stress, struggle and challenges. However, while sometimes unhappy in the moment, these people – connected to a larger sense of purpose and value – make positive contributions to society.
Happiness without meaning is characterized by a relatively shallow and often self-oriented life, in which things go well, needs and desires are easily satisfied, and difficult or taxing entanglements are avoided, the report noted.
And so, the meaningful life guides actions from the past through the present to the future, giving one a sense of direction. It offers ways to value good and bad alike, and gives us justifications for our aspirations. From achieving our goals to regarding ourselves in a positive light, a life of meaningfulness is considerably different than mere happiness.
"People have strong inner desires that shape their lives with purpose and focus – qualities that ultimately make for a uniquely human experience," said Aaker.
The research team included Roy Baumeister at Florida State University, Kathleen Vohs at the University of Minnesota and Stanford doctoral student Emily Garbinsky.